Tuesday Joy

I had just driven off from that tiny airport in northwest Houston. I had delivered food to someone who was working a long shift and was heading back to the more populated area, so that I could be sent another order by DoorDash. My eyes noticed a single tree on the side of the small, country road. The thing that caught my eye was the single pink bloom on the side of the tree. I cannot explain it, but I felt an exponential surge of JOY upon seeing it. The area behind my eyes that usually burgeons with pain when I am hurt by someone’s mean-heartedness…well, it burgeoned again, but it was a completely different feeling this time. It was one of those moments where I knew that–despite how hard life can often be–that I had this blessing of having a really great life and of being one of the luckiest girls in the world. These little moments…these TINY moments of beauty and love and acceptance and understanding that do not come in like a conquering soldier demanding to be seen and congratulated, but as a tiny footstep like a child taking their first step. And those moments are just as important. These moments are what I call ‘Tuesday Joy.’

I'm going to....

 I'm putting this out in the ether so that I will have said something and will have to be responsible for it.  I am going to follow the reversing diabetes diet which is basically a) as little animal products as possible b) as little vegetable oils as possible, and c) choosing the lower glycemic choice when given two options.   I haven't diabetes for over 30 years now and I've never controlled it.   

I read the book by Dr. Neal Barnard called 'Reversing Diabetes' and his information and the scientific experiments they did are compelling.    I spent three weeks in April not consuming foods with extra sugar and turning away from dr. pepper and choclate bars and 'ades' at the cafes and I survived.  Belu, my friend who is doing this with me, and I chose 3 days at the end of the 21 days to eat what we wanted (which included Dr. Pepper, banana pudding, burgers and fries, etc. and by the end of the 3 days, we were both TIRED of the 'bad' food.  It was "mostly" EASY to get back on the 'good' diet aftewards, so I feel confident that I can do this new diet without too many breaks.   

I've decided to do it as heartily as I can until AT LEAST the Monday of Summer Breaks (what ever the latest Monday is in July) and then go see the dr. during out break, so that I can have the medical numbers to back up whether or not this has helped me.    Already (after just one week) I have lost a few pounds, my blood sugar numbers are so good that I have had to REMOVE one of my diabetes meds, and My blood pressure is almost always in the 'normal' ranger (which it hasn't been since January.    

Anyway, I'm pleased with the results for now and I'm going to strive diligently to follow this as well as I can and to CONQUER this disease and be a healthy older lady who is NOT frail!

thanks for listening. (bows)

Authority

There is a man from a website of which I am a member. He started a message board war regarding biblical authority. He feels that a certain activity is acceptable behavior in the sight of God and many others disagree with him and have written responses to his posts trying to show him scriptures which prove their point. He finally got to the point where he was tired of hearing the phrase "it is not authorized in the Bible" so he began a new thread about the word "authorized". What follows is his original post and then my response to it.
He says on 5/12/07 at 6:50 p.m.: I hear people using the word Authorized on the site alot and no where do I see it found in the new testament in alot of different versions and specially not the way alot use it.
I said:
The idea of AUTHORITY is replete in the Bible. It has been this way since the beginning of time. After all, God spoke the very world into existence. That is the ultimate authority! Early on, it is clearly illustrated (Deut. 11: 26-28) that God's word is something which we ought to follow AND that there are consequences if we do not follow it. That is authority. Later on, authority is shown to belong to Christ (Matthew 17:5; 28:18-20.) As I said, authority is EVERYWHERE in the Bible.
Every christian understands the concept of authority. If they don't understand it, they would never have obeyed the Gospel. Why would anyone ever bother to be baptized and make efforts to be obedient if he didn't believe in an Authority who says that, without obedience, spiritual death is assured? You cannot continue in Christianity without a committment to submitting to the authority of God and His word (the Bible.)
Here is my main point. You are allowed to believe (because of free will) whatever you want about the acceptability of using musical instruments in worship, whether you are right or wrong. However, you should know (before you try to use this argument anymore) that the word authority is a NOUN and the word authorized is an ADJECTIVE. But they are basically the SAME word. Therefore, you will not be able to support (logically, anyway) your theology with the argument that the word "authorized" is not present in the King James version of the Bible. It may be true that the word is not physically printed in the pages of your Bible, however, the concept of "authorized" is painted on every single page of the 66 books of the Bible...and with bright colors that anyone can recognize.

Just some food for thought, y'all.

My 'Existential Crisis'

 You know, I'm one of those weirdoes who doesn't believe that 'climate change' is going to make mankind go extinct. I believe it is a good idea to take care of our planet and throw trash away and recycle and all that jazz, but I'm not on the 'climate change is going to kill us' bandwagon.   I've seen too many of these predictions not come anywhere even close to fruition to believe any new ones.   I just don't believe it is an 'existential crisis' like so many do.  

But this morning, September 13th, 2025, I'm having something of an existential crisis, personally.   As pretty much everyone knows, Charlie Kirk was ASSASSINATED on Wednesday.  I was looking on instagram and was watching one of his videos and actually saw his death in front of my own eyes.  When it happened, I was fast asleep because it was 3:23 a.m. in Seoul.  So, he had already been dead for three hours by the time that I--very unfortunately--watched the video.  

It was a traumatic scene for me, even though I was watching it online and 6,000 miles away.  It was obvious that he was dead, although the news I read just afterward told me that he was clinging to life.  Obviously, things didn't continue in that fashion.  Charlie is dead.

And--even just with that information, this situation was devastating.  Charlie was a person who was kind, smart, funny, and strove diligently to engage with EVERYONE from every political or religious background.  He wantead to debate and help change minds and get people to see the truth.  I realize that some of his detractors have hand-picked PARTS of his videos to make him look 'evil.'   One of my American co-workers (a young girl, about 24) said on Thursday that she didn't think it was right that he was killed, but he "was evil', so..."    Basically, that 'so ellipses' means, so it was justified.

CLEARLY, she didn't watch all his videos or she couldn't possibly have said that, right?  But here is where the REAL problem comes for me.  IMMEDIATELY, there were people like her (and some of my other co-workers) who were MUCH MORE vehement in their feelings about it.  I saw videos of people actually dancing jubilantly, cheering, giggling, crowing, and showing actual JOY about his death.  

I just DON'T understand.  Joining with friends the night of his death and chanting into a bullhorn "We shot Charlie in the neck" in the round, clapping, dancing, and cheering?  WHAT?  ellipses  WHAT?   

How can SOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOO many American people have such hate-filled hearts?  It is astounding and appalling and devastating and HEART-BREAKING to see, especially because I--a 56 year-old American--have seen our nation do so much good in my time.  I have seen us step up to the challenge to help not only our own citizenry, but also other humans from ALL OVER THE WORLD.  I mean...HOW can we have stooped to this dog feces level?

We sent $3-4 BILLION to the survivors of the Christmas Day Thailand Tsunami.  We sent hundreds of millions to the victims of Hurricane Harvey in 2017 and I PERSONALLY saw  (because I lived in Houston at the time) uncountable people stopped and--on the side of Highway 10--lowering their personal boats into the flood waters so they could row out to help people who were living in the flood devastated areas of Southeast Texas. We gave 1.8 Billion after the 2010 Haitian earthquake.   AND we gave almost 7 Billion combined after the tragedies of Hurricane Katrina and 9/11.  We can CLEARLY be people with amazing hearts and capacity for good toward others.

Yet, we, now--in 2025--have become a nation with half of her people CELEBRATING the death of a person, while at the same time demanding retribution on a police officer/brave citizens for stopping  career criminal from continuing to harm others?  We have become people who will donate to go-fund-me accounts for men who brutally murder strangers because of the color of their skin?

What has my country become?  My existential crisis is this:  I don't know what is happening to my great nation.  What is wrong with her?  Where have her morals gone?  Where has her good-heartedness gone?  Where is her 'fight-for-the-underdog' gone?   Why does it feel as if we have become a stinking, steaming, hideous, pile of dog offal under the shoe of the world?   

My identity is strongly rooted in being a Christian, a veteran, and an American.  I feel such a deep loss. I feel a (weirdly) personal loss for Charlie Kirk, even though I never knew him.  I think it is because I knew he was working to help save our nation.  But I also feel a deeply disturbing and depressing loss of faith in my nation and her people.  How have we become so angry, hate-filled, vicious, and murderous?

What have we become?  WHAT HAVE WE BECOME?

whew...

 Life has been hectic, and--even though I did SO MUCH today--it's alreayd 8:58 p.m.   

I'm not ready to have to face another week of work.  I'm not ready to get up too early to do laundry.  

I have SO MANY things to do, both personally and professionally.  I feel like it never ends.  Does it feel that way to y'all, too?

I'm feeling a little frustrated because I KNOW i have things to do, and I WANT to do them, but I feel like I can't even sit down to write a list of what I need/want to do.     I think it would be helpful if I did.  I could tape it to the wall and check off boxes as I go.

Keep me in your prayers!!

Love y'all, 

The luckiest girl in the world

CTM, Day #6

 Tuesday, 29JUL25, 10:58 a.m. Hwagok-dong, Gangseo-gu, Seoul-si

Today is going to be hard.  Have you ever had to eat a liquid diet for 24 hours?  I am having a test at the doctor's tomorrow, so the only thing I can eat that is solid today  is a bowl of rice porridge around 3:30 p.m.  Then, at 7 p.m, I have to take 2 dulcolax tablets, then at 8 p.m., I have to drink 1 container of Miralax (or something like it, every 30 minutes for 1-1/2 hours, then at 4 a.m. I have to do ANOTHER one.  

I'm having several tests tomorrow, and--obviously--one of them is a colonoscopy.  I'm going to be sedated for it, and there going to do 2 more tests, I think while I'm under.

All I know is that I'm going to be VERY hungry by the time it is over.  I'm kind of halting between 2 sides about the aftermath.  I mean, I've been trying to change my eating lifestyle, and my brain wants to say 'Look! You're system will be empty! Start off on a good foot.  Cut up some carrots and cucumbers and thaw some lentils!" Bring it with you and you can eat it whenever the doc says you can. You'll be starting off really well!!"  and the other side of me is saying, "There is a KFC next door to the doctor's office.  Wouldn't mashed potatoes with gravy be GREAT!!"   Of course, potatoes are acceptable on the new diet lifestyle, so maybe if I paired it with a coleslaw, it would be okay??

I'm afraid of how today is going to go because I'm already very hungry and it is only just past 11 a.m.   Maybe I should take a nap?

Calling the Muses, Day # 6

 Hwagok-dong, Gangseo-gu, Seoul-si,  9:31 p.m. Friday, 25JUL25

I have fallen down on the job this week.  I think the last time I wrote was 8 days ago.  However, in my defense, this week has been EXTREMELY hectic.  We had a HUGE project with the kids, which I was mainly in charge of the execution of.    It is over now and the kids did very well, but I'll tell ya....I am GLAD it is over.   I learned some lessons, though.    Let me explain the week.

We had a song festival.  Since I'm the 'singing' teacher at my school, I was in charge of choosing the songs, teaching the kids the songs, and (me who has no skill) choreographing the dance moves.  

Strangely, the youngest two groups learned their songs the quickest. Of course, their songs were VERY easy.  Y'all have heard of "Oh, Mr. Sun" and "I am a baby giraffe" haven't ya?   Those were the sungs sung by Clover Class and Violet Class.  They are all 3 turning 4 years old.They did very well.  

The next oldest group did 'Fly Me To The Moon' and they learned the words and the movements SO well.  At first, the powers that be didn't think they could do it, but I knew they could. Plus, one of the things I REALLY want to do while I'm here is teach these kids some of the music I loved (and still love) from my childhood.   I know that Frank Sinatra is well before my time, but I listened to the oldies station just as much as the 80s station when I was a teen.  Tulip Class was the one who sang 'Fly Me To The Moon" and it was really great.  They are all 4 turning 5 and were AWESOME. I wish I could share the videos of them.

The Next class has 14 kids so they required that I teach them two songs, so that the class could be divided into two groups.  This class is Sunflower and I love ALL of them; however, that class is FILLED with BIG personalities and it is hard to keep them on task.  I have to use my 'mad mom' voice WAAAYYYY too often in there.   So, I chose 'L.O.VE.' by Nat King Cole for one group and we ended up with 'Don't Worry. Be Happy' for the other group. I had originally chosen 'Three Little Birds' by Bob Marley for group two, but the-powers-that-be decided it was too hard.  I tried to explain that it was TWO verses sung over and over again, but they vetoed it for the much harder and longer DWBH, which we ended up cutting down to just two verses anyway. 

The issue with Sunflower is really that there was twice the work to do in the same amount of time as the other classes had (namely 30 minutes once a week for 3/5-4 months) We ended up NOT getting the songs down until the VERY end of the prep time (basically...this week)  I think they ended up doing a great job, but then *I* am only worried about them having fun and looking mostly capable and NOT what the parents think or what all the other schools in our franchise think.   I think they were super, super, JINJA cute.  :)

The last class to perform was my DAISY class and we picked a song that we have been singing the entire year (since March 4th) and that was "Friday, I'm in Love" by the Cure.     They really did an awesome job and looked so cute and they really liked the song.  August is my last month for officially teaching them singing, as a class subject.  So, we’re covering ‘I will’ by the Beatles and ‘Puff, the Magic Dragon’ by Peter, Paul, and Mary.  So, far they are liking the new songs

I think it ended up being a really cool song festival.  Thankfully, it is over and I was informed of several things a) I won't be teaching singing for the second semester for Sunflower and Daisy. They won't be having ANY singing classes.  Instead, I'll be doing a kindergarten version of an Essay Writing class for them. HOWEVER, we will have another song festival in Late January AND Daisy Class will sing a song at their graduation ceremony on February 26th.   I WILL be in charge of that and I'm pondering which songs to choose.  I want something that says "Yes. We're in kindergarten, but the world is our oyster and we're going out to make it a better place"    So far, I've thought of Natasha Bedingfield (sp:) 'Unwritten', but it IS really long.  I suppose it could be shortened to have fewer verses.   Do y'all have any ideas for songs?

Also, as a total aside,  I've been praying and would love it if y'all would pray (or send good thoughts) that I and my co-workers can find jobs next year where there are very few reasons for us to complain about anything.   I'd like to find a job near the water (I'm considering Busan/Haundae/Mokpo) where  they understand that we're fairly intelligent and capable if we got all the way over here and that they  give us the support we need, but not try to micromanage every single, tiny aspect of the job.  I'd love to be respected and be in a school where they engender loyalty and where we the teachers and they, the powers-that-be, can work together to continue building a school that will really make the world a better place.  I really want to find a school where I can possibly stay until I'm ready to leave Korea.   Keep that kind of thing on your prayer list, won't ya?   

Okay, It's nearing my bedtime. I've got to go teach five young girls at a children's home in the morning.  

Love y'all!

Calling the Muses, # 5

 

17JUL25  Hwagok-dong, Gangseo-gu, Seoul-si.  6:33 a.m. (Thursday)

If it weren't for the fact that Fridays are Fridays, Thursdays would be my favorite day of the week at this school.   I get 2 thirty minute prep periods instead of just 1, and I have a whole hour after the regular day ends.   We're at the end of the month, so there is naturally a lot of grading to do.  Plus, the September schedule is due at the end of the first week of August.  PLUS, I'm in charge of the Song Festival.  We're down to 4 days to practice because NEXT WEDNESDAY is the Song Festival.   I also have to memorize my 'host' speech to be given in  between each performance.

I have a LOT to do for school PLUS two of my students are moving to America after the Summer Break, so I have to work on their paintings. Last year, I personally painted each of my  students one of my child-like bird paintings and I want to be able to give one to Chloe and Joshua before they leave, also.  So, as you can prolly read, the next week will be full of stuff to do.  

I also just found out that I'll probably have to teach writing to my two oldest classes next semester, instead of singing.  Especially considering that one of those abovementioned classes is SUNFLOWER, I'm feeling a bit intimidated.  There are 14 kids and each lesson has to be done in 30 minutes.  SIGH. I basically have to turn into a drill sergeant with this class.  But...I LOVE the kids. I just REALLY don't like the way that the 'powers-that-be' think that all this can be done in the time allotted.  It is REALLY too much.  AND knowing which person in my chain of command is choosing the books that I'll be teaching from....I don't have a lot of faith that a book will be chosen that will be reasonably done in the class time.   

Thankfully, I WILL have 9 whole days off of work beginning on the 26th, but it won't be entirely restful.  On the 30th, I have one of those doctor's appointments where they check EVERYTHING.  I'll have some heart tests, a colonoscopy, my normal diabetic check-up, and one or two other things.  SIGH.  Then on Friday, the 1st, I'll have a dental appointment.  That one isn't so bad cos I scheduled it at 11 a.m. and then afterwards, I can go straight to Taco Amigo and have my normal birthday lunch. After that, I'l take a very long subway ride ( 2 hours and 30 minutes (Seoul Metro is huge!!!) Guess I'll have to study my languages!) to the island where Incheon Airport is and stay at a hotel about 350 feet from the beach.  I'm really excited.  

Anyway, that is enough for today.  I love y'all!!

Calling the Muses, Day # 4

So, it looks like some mornings are busier than others, so I don't always get to this project every day.   I feel like that if I keep working on writing every day, then eventually, I'll be able to finish  several books in the 'Hunter, the hero bird' series and maybe go to a publisher to see if they would publish them.  Worst comes to worse, I can self publish (print upon  purchase) on lulu.com. Anyway, I'm trying to show up for myself (and my future self) as often as possible. 

As you know, I'm a kindergarten teacher in Seoul.   The job is hard and challenging, but mostly due to the administration and NOT the children.   I just love them.  They have such good hearts!  The other day, one of them--we'll call him Rex--sort of hugged me around the knees.  He is SO strong, though, at 4 years old, that he moved a certain way and we both fell down.  I scraped my right forearm and I got a huge lesion on my right knee (which has--by the way--received many, many, many, many similar lesions throughout the years).   It is a little swollen and infected while it is healing, but life goes on.  

What makes me smile so much is that--upon sitting down after the fall and injury--nearly ALL of the female students in my class (between ages 3-6) came up to me and were 'patting' me as if to comfort me, giving me kisses on my hands, and saying 'It's all right!"

Even yesterday--a full 4 days after the fall--when they saw the (now scar) on my knee, they tried to 'kiss it to make it better.'   It was so sweet.  Of course, I told them to kiss their hands and touch it, instead of using their lips on my scarred knee, but it was definitely sweet and the thought counted quite a bit   

Just in case, I haven't told you--I'm the luckiest girl in the world!

Day 3 (but 'calendarly' 5...i didn't write yesterday

Sunday, 13JUL25 5:53 p.m. Hwagok-dong, Gangseo-gu, Seoul-Si

I remember once--when I was in the Air Force and stationed at the Air Force Academy--that I was talking to one of the sergeants who was also stationed there and working in the X-ray department with me.  We were walking out to our vehicles and heading back to the dorms. (Well, she MIGHT have been going to an apartment or home. I can't remember if she lived in the dorms or not--I think not, though.)   Anyway, I can't remember how this subject came up, but I responded to something she said with something similar to "There isn't anything really i feel that makes me feel like getting up in the morning"   I was NOT telling her I wanted to kill myself or anything, but I just didn't feel like life was all that great.

In some SMALL ways, I feel similarly now.  I DO love teaching.  I DON'T love the overall environment at work. It is slightly toxic and full of drama.  I'm kinda afraid that working here in Korea will ALWAYS be like this.  I don't have close friends and am struggling with finding friends that I can be close with. And I'm struggling with learning the language which would PROBABLY help with that making friends thing, ya know?   

I always feel tired and I'm struggling with making sure I treat my body well in regard to what I put in it and the exercise I give to it.  Creatively, I don't really feel like I'm doing much to 'exercise' that muscle either.  I have nebulous plans to do things in the future, but...sometimes I'm not sure how to make them happen.

I will admit that I"m studying languages pretty often and now I"m writing nearly every day in hope that I'll be inspired to work on a few more "Hunter, the Hero Bird' books, but I struggle with eating right and getting enough rest, and basically doing things that will make my life one which is THRIVING.  

I keep trying, but I--sometimes--feel like the effort is fruitless at this moment.    I don't want to give up, though.  Any advice?

Thanks for letting me vent.   

Love y'all!

Calling the Muses: Day 2

11JUL25 6:22 a.m.  Hwagok-dong, Gangseo-gu, Seoul-si

First off...I haven't been sleeping very well the last few nights, plus I slept HORRIBLY when I was in The States cos of jet lag, so maybe none of what I write today will make any sense.  It is early. I awoke in the wee hours and wasn't able to get back to sleep.  I've been up for four hours. I MIGHT have slept around....maybe 5.   I think today might be a bit of a challenge with my munkins cos it's Friday and they are often a little bit 'wild' on Friday.  But--I can get through it.  I'll be off work in 10 1/2 hours!

I've been working on a new eating lifestyle for the past two months. (Consider buying 'Perfect Health: The Natural Way' by Mary-Ann Shearer)  I actually really BELIEVE in this way of eating and believe it will work for my health; however, I'm really struggling with implementing SOME of the aspects of it. I'm really annoyed that--somewhere inside of me--there is this inclination to feel GUILT when I don't choose the most healthy of options.  I know that the human body and psyche will sometimes need to 'cheat' and that it is--in general--to do so, sometimes.   But I really don't like the guilt and I wish I could find a way to get rid of it.   Any ideas?

Also, I was really surprised the other morning, when I weighed for the first time in at least 2 weeks, that I HAD NOT gained weight while eating everything I wanted for the 8 days I was away from Korea visiting family in The States.  In fact, I had lost a pound!  Weird! (Rachel Zeigler has slightly ruined this word for me.  Every time I hear it, I think of her patronizing way of mocking a classic movie that was very apropos for its time.)   Anyway, this health journey is one step at a time, so I'm going to work toward a time when...maybe...a week or two goes by without me making the least healthy choice!  

It's been so hot in Seoul that I haven't done much walking lately...beyond what is required to get to and from work.  However, the other night--when I couldn't sleep--I went for a walk around 2:40 in the morning.  The temp was in the 80s, but it was SO DRY that it felt cooler.  I really love it when the humidity is low.  The problem is that I am NOT normally up at 2:40 in the morning AND the district where I live in Seoul (though Seoul is EXTREMELY safe as a  whole) is considered the 'murder' capital of Seoul, so a part of me doesn't necessarily feel like going around walking while the bad guys might still be up and about it the wisest idea I've ever had. So, I have a quandary.  When I sleep well, I like getting up early. I usually study languages and maybe write a bit, like I'm doing now.  I wonder if there is a way to find the time to do some walking first-thing, too.  I feel like there is not enough time, but maybe if I did my lunch prep the night before I could swing it??  

Anyway, those are the thoughts I've written down this a.m. during day # 2 of my new attempt to lure my writing muses back from their extended vacations.   Hope y'all have a great Friday and 좋은 주말 보내세요!

Love ya!

Calling the Muses

 10JUL25-6:40 a.m. Hwagok-dong, Gangseo-gu, Seoul-si. 07702

I have 1 hour and 50 minutes before I ABSOLUTELY must be leaving my tiny apartment in order to get to work JUST in the nick of time.  I also have to prep some lunch and maybe clean up a little.  At least I have my outfit planned!

Today I’m going to TRY very HARD to drink only water except at lunch. That way I can keep my braces in for most of the day.  I only have about 7 weeks left of these things and there are still some gaps in my left top section. (ya know…the area where the food gets stuck?)  This ‘braces’ situation is one of many that remind me that I am not REALLY good at being a REAL adult.   My health (and lack of will power regarding it) is another aspect of myself which supports this idea that I’m not really good at it.

But, I’m trying.  I mean, I actually have a job where I’m in charge of other people all day long. Granted they are 4-6 year old people, but STILL. I’m doing something important and well.

I really want to get back to writing and hopefully get a few more Hunter books written so that I can maybe have a stream of income in my old age.  

The problem is that my writing muses are almost always off on a vacation…probably somewhere tropical with their toes in the sand under a pink umbrella drinking unsweetened iced teas which are brought to them regularly by handsome, fit and healthy, flirty-smiling, dark-haired twenty-something.  I can totally understand why they don’t really want to come back.   But I really need them back, so I’m going to try to spend at least ten minutes every day writing—something—so that maybe they’ll feel compelled to return to me.

I’m also studying Duolingo every day. I’m going to be living here in Korea for at least five more years and then somewhere else after that.  I’m really drawn to the ABC islands in the Caribbean, so I’m studying Dutch (which so far is SURPRISINGLY easy) and continuing in my learning of Spanish. I have about a 40% proficiency with it. For now, I’m studying ONLY Dutch because I want to catch up my Dutch to my Spanish.  Then when that happens (in 22 units), I’ll do one unit of Dutch, one unit of Spanish, and then as many units of Korean as I can every day.  Since I still have at least ‘til February of 2031 here in Korea (if my nebulous plans stay the same) then I need to continue trying to become proficient in Korean, too. If I'm honest, though, Korean is MUCH harder than the other two.  And I feel more drawn to the other two because I see my progress much more swiftly.  

Part of that is likely because Spanish and Dutch use the same letting system as English.  Another part is because I have been exposed to Spanish regularly for 46 years, so it is just more ‘comfy’ than many other languages.  An additional part is that Dutch feels like English spoken with a little bit of an attitude. LOL I mean…it is EXTREMELY easy sometimes, especially if you’ve had ANY exposure to German. An example: what do you think ‘De man eet een appel’ means?   I KNOW you got it right.  Sure, you have to learn the verb tenses (which they don’t REALLY have in Korean, as much) but it is still really easy.  

The reason, by the way, that I’ve chosen to learn Dutch is because it is the governmental language on the ABC islands because they were once Netherland (ic?) (ish?) colonies.   

I’ve always loved the beach and would really like to live near once; however, I DO NOT want to be in the hurricane belt.  And, supposedly–according to the modern day encyclopedia (you know, Google), they only get hit by hurricanes every 25 to 30 years. 

Anyway, I think that may be enough for today.  It is 7:02 a.m. and I should probably get started on preparing lunch.  (Ninety-Nine % of the time, I bring lunch from home)    Therefore, I will bid you adieu! (Crosses fingers) Here’s hoping this call to My Writing Muses will come home soon!

Love y’all!

Authority

 The idea of AUTHORITY is replete in the Bible. It has been this way since the beginning of time. After all, God spoke the very world into existence. That is the ultimate authority! Early on, it is clearly illustrated (Deut. 11: 26-28) that God's word is something which we ought to follow AND that there are consequences if we do not follow it. That is authority. Later on, authority is shown to belong to Christ (Matthew 17:5; 28:18-20.) As I said, authority is EVERYWHERE in the Bible.

Every christian understands the concept of authority. If they don't understand it, they would never have obeyed the Gospel. Why would anyone ever bother to be baptized and make efforts to be obedient if he didn't believe in an Authority who says that, without obedience, spiritual death is assured? You cannot continue in Christianity without a committment to submitting to the authority of God and His word (the Bible.)
Here is my main point. You are allowed to believe (because of free will) whatever you want about the acceptability of using musical instruments in worship, whether you are right or wrong. However, you should know (before you try to use this argument anymore) that the word authority is a NOUN and the word authorized is an ADJECTIVE. But they are basically the SAME word. Therefore, you will not be able to support (logically, anyway) your theology with the argument that the word "authorized" is not present in the King James version of the Bible. It may be true that the word is not physically printed in the pages of your Bible, however, the concept of "authorized" is painted on every single page of the 66 books of the Bible...and with bright colors that anyone can recognize.

Just some food for thought, y'all.

Drama Class Final Grade Comments

 I know this will seem like bragging to some, but I was so pleased and gratified with the comments that my acting professor wrote on my final that I really want to share them.

Loralee,
-Both monologues were outstanding!
-Your work is some of the best I've ever seen.
-I HOPE you will continue as an actress--in some way--either professional or amateur--because you have that raw talent necessary.
Anyway, you have been a tremendous JOY in class!

Final: 100

From the cobwebs: Mother's Day 2008

 Current mood: thankful

So, this morning, I was at Whataburger having breakfast and preparing a package to send to my mom (for mother's day) and my dad (for his birthday) and I decided that I would write a poem for my mom in her card. It is very very very very very corny, but I think mom's, in general, don't mind those kinds of poems. So, I thought I'd give y'all a good laugh, too. Happy Mother's Day all of my wonderful friends who are mothers!

Here it is:

On this day we celebrate our mothers,
I'll have you know that, to me, there is no other

who can compare to the fabulosity that is you.
Why, on a cold day, no one can make a greater stew!!

And, I"m quite sure that a scrape or two you tended,
and those small teenage broken hearts you mended.

Many life lessons to me, you patiently taught.
(well--you tried anyway. I'm kinda stubborn!!)
Dinners, Claudes, and hotel rooms you bought.

Mostly though, you cheerfully encourage me in all endeavors
even to the point of reading bad poetry on Mother's day-no matter the weather!

From the Cobwebs: The thing is...

 The thing is...

Current mood: disgusted and amazed at the audacity of some people

...you, "M'sH", do not get to decide where my soul is going. God does. Though it sounds like I'm being snotty and defensive... I just gotta say this one thing: Perhaps you ought to be looking at your own soul. Jesus more often dealt with sinners in a gentle manner. Aren't we supposed to model ourselves after Him? Very rarely did He raise His voice. He wasn't defamatory. He wasn't hateful. His concern was for souls. It did not lie with being right or being some "knife point", circle drawing crusader for God or with His own reputation. YOU...however...are angry, and hateful, and impatient, and undeservingly self-righteous, and you make assumptions which your "evidence" does not support. Yes!!!!!! Please, please do some introspection M'sH...and use the standard of God's Word when you do it...so that you can see what you really look like and the damage you have done to the Bride of Christ!! You've been away from the mirror long enough, sir. You've forgotten what YOU look like. My suggestion is that you look in the mirror again. I think I see something in your eye. Yeah...just there.

p.s. I've been praying for you.

The Struggle

Well, today I've been here for two years and one month.  I thought I would blog SO much more, but my muse has been on a very, very extended vacation. When she comes to visit, we have the BEST time and she helps me create some AMAZING things, but, sadly, she doesn't come as often as I would like for her to visit.

I feel like--maybe--I just need to try to force it? What do y'all think? Maybe I should just make Sunday mornings a blog morning?  I also would like to start working on my hero bird series because I truly think I could do something useful for kids who are learning about life.  On another note, completely, it'd be great to have an alternate stream of income, yeah?

The fact is this:  I'm getting older.  I mostly enjoy teaching and can prolly do it (in person) for several more years yet.  I likely need to learn how to do it online and market that skill also.  I can do that when I'm even older, while sitting down at my desk at home.   I'm getting older and have nothing in savings really, so I need to figure out some passive income streams, if possible.   

I've thought of several.

1.  crocs affiliate

2. children's books

3.  teaching English online

4. editing people's writing

5.  maybe a VLOG on one of the Social Media sites?  Not sure about what, though.   Teaching or  DYI stuff like making your own vanilla extracts,etc, or Interesting historical facts?  or What life is like in the (non-American) countries I'm living in?  Or similarities and differences  between languages?

What do y'all think? does any of that sound interesting?

Another reason that I'd like to figure out a few passive income streams is that I feel like I'd like to find a country to live in (very near the beach, but not the hurricane prone Carribean) like Costa Rica, Chile, Aruba, Bonaire, Curacao where I can maybe teach English part-time (or full-time) and live a more laid-back life.    Y'all know me.  I'm not the most normal grown-up on the planet.    But I also need to be able to keep earning/saving money and live in a place with healthcare--because of my diabetes.

I am leaning toward Spanish-speaking countries because I am more proficient in Spanish than any other language and I feel like studying it  most mornings between now and February 2 to 3 years hence would make me even more able to live in a country where it is spoken by a majority of the people.  Also, the countries I mentioned have lots and lots of beaches.    Plus, latin society is more laid back than Korea.   (I think I might be 'plus-ing' a lot!) 

So, that is where my thoughts are leaning.  I have so much research to do.   If any of y'all can think of non-Atlantic Ocean beachy, Spanish-speaking countries where they need 'English-As-A-Foreign-Language' Teaachers, send me a note. :)    

So, that is what is up, y'all.   I'll try to do a blog soon about what I've been experiencing in the schools where I'm working.  I just don't want to do too many 'complaining' blogs. LOL

💖🧡

I am so....

 I am angry and annoyed and just plain exasperated at my bosses and their unreasonable expectations and the extra work load they are putting on us, all the while taking prep time AWAY from us. I found out from my immediate superviser that she was unprofessionally, unreasonably, indecently, and unkindly screamed at for 40 minutes about something which was WAAYYYY not important enough to receive that hateful kind of communication.    Honestly, I'm struggling at this job, but like it enough, usually, to have considered trying to stay an additional year at this school until things line up for me to make some slight changes, but her (the big boss) behavior toward my immediate boss just put the nail in the coffin for THAT idea. Who knows when she'll try it with me.  I gave my word when I signed a contract 'til 28FEB25, so I'll stay and work, as to the Lord, but I don't think I can support that kind of behavior afterwards.

 I don't like having to move every year.  And part of me wants to try to teach English to adults.  I'm praying to God for a work situation where I will be appreciated, the bosses are honorable people who pay me on time and respect everyone and I make enough to save money for when I'm too old to work. 

I'm also praying for guidance as to where I should move when I am too old to work.  I've been looking at Costa Rica, Aruba, Curacao, and Bonaire.   We'll see.  I really don't want to go  home because my experience and skills do not amount to enough for me to live even close to comfortbly and without having to depend on someone else.   and I like living in other countries. Don't get me wrong. I love America, but I also love other places.   If you're a praying person, please pray for me to recognize shut doors and strive for and recognize open doors.   

Okay, that is enough whining. Plus, I worked WAY longer than I thought I would have to on this extra work load AND I'm not even done yet; however, I work better in the early part of the day than I do in the later, so I should get some sleep so I can get stuff done in the morning. Thanks for 'listening.'

Love y'all.

Things I learned and Did in Bali over Christmas, 2023

 Well--I arrived home after nearly 24 hours of traveling, this morning at 5 a.m.  It was foggy and rainy and cold at Incheon Airport--which was COMPLETELY opposite of what I had left in Bali.  It took me five more hours to get back to my cozy apartment, for reasons, I will discuss later.   The vacation was okay, but it definitely was NOWHERE near my favorite one, ever.  

I planned well, in advance, I thought.  I bought a ticket on the airport shuttle for 3:30 pm on Saturday, which would get me to the airport a full four hours in advance.  I planned to stop at a convenience store to get more cash out, but the one I stopped at didn't have ATM and by the time I got to the bus stop, I didn't mwant to risk missing it by crossing the big city street and walking to the bank nearby.  So, I decided to wait to use an ATM at the airport. Lesson # 1--go the bank in advance and get all the cash you want beforehand!  I happen to have one of those 'under your shirt safety/storage' necklaces where I can store all my cash/id cards/passport, etc. out of sight and just keep $20 bucks in my pants pocket. I will DEFINITELY do it this way next time. 

The wait in line at the airport was semi-long, but I think I only waited a total of about 45 minutes.   I was so happy when she didn't make me check my baggage--which I knew was overweight and was planning to check--cos that would have cost me $25!   After I checked in, I was planning to get some cash, go through security, and leisurely eat something at the airport. I'd been so busy cleaning and packing that, at that point in the day (around 6:45 pm.) I'd only eaten a hard boiled egg, drank a doctor pepper, and eaten half of a plate of sausage and stir fried vegetables.  I was busy and justified it cos I wanted the apartment clean and the laundry done and I knew I'd have time to eat at the airport. I mean... I was going to be there 4 hours early!

Alas--the initial aspect of my 'Comedy of Errors, Vacation Style' was about to begin!  I stood at the ATM and put my card in.  It didn't go in, so I pushed it once and then again.   Finally, the machine took it, but...did NOT begin the process of working.  Here is lesson # 2 that I learned on my vacation.  If the ATM doesn't take it, immediately take it out and go to a different machine.  The machine never gave my card back.  I started panicking.    A nice Korean airport worker (who could speak English) stopped to help me and called the number on the machine.  They said it would take an hour to get to the machine, which would have been okay cos it was only 7:05 and my flight didn't leave until 9:15.    But let's be real, y'all, yeah?  It didn't take and hour.  About 8:15, I got in line at the security area which was very, very long.  I was hoping things would go well, but I was starting to be afraid that I wouldn't even make my flight.  Thankfully, one of the policemen who has stopped by several times during my hour and 10 minute wait for someone to come rescue my card.  He motioned for me to follow him and very leisurely walked me over to another section of airport and placed me at the end of a very short line for 'priority boarding'  which made me security experience only about 15 minutes long.   I was so thankful!  Finally, through with that part, I took a tram from our section of the airport to the International Departures section and I made it to my gate with the $150 and 10 minutes to spare.  

I got a water at the Aunt Annies and my phone rang! It was the credit card rescue guys! They had my card! I was so happy, except that my plane has just started boarding and I wouild have had to take the tram all the way back to the main terminal, go outside of security to meet them by  'The middle bathrooms' to pick it up.  There was no way I would have made it.  Strangely enough, it turned out that we sat at the gate for about 30 plus minutes after boarding, so I MIGHT have actually been able to make that journey and get back to the gate in the alotted time, but they likely would not have let me on board the plane.  So, I left....without any means of support except the $150 in my pocket.  Now, Bali is VERY cheap, but I soon learned that  $150 won't cover 7 days of food and the $47 Instant Visa at the Bali airport.  I had looked it up and thought the Visa was only $25 USD.  Nope.   

So, thankfully, I have an alert and thoughtful friend who offered to send me some moolah via Western Union.  It only cost $8!  Yay!  Upon receipt of my 4 million 88 thousand and 44 Indonesian Rupiah, I felt more secure.  It made me feel a ton better and safer in a place one quarter of the world away from my home.  Lesson # 3 was this:  Overestimate what you think you'll need.  Things always come up.  I spent the whole first day Thinking I was okay and then spent every evening counting and recounting to make sure I didn't overspend.  You'd be surprised, even though they're cheap, how easily things add up and how many things you'll need to pay for that you didn't think about or expect!  I didn't think about it 'til maybe Wednesday or Thursday, but I'd have to pay for meals AND water in the AIRPORT for the last 24 hours of my journey home.  That always cost twice as much as everything else.  Next lesson?  Next time, I'll make sure i have at least $100 in my pocket (and/or a non-machine eaten ATM Card) in my pocket before I start the journey home.  Also, ask your hotel if they have a shuttle to the airport, how much it'll cost and PAY IT IN advance, so that concern is off your list.

Be prepared (which y'all probably already are) to be hounded and manipulated and harassed by the people who work in the streets making their daily bread from tourists.  I understand they are trying to feed their children, but DUDE!!! these people are persistent.  Finally, I learned to say:  "I'm making gift buying decisions on _________ (insert name of last day here.)  I also learned to NEVER LEAVE THE HOTEL without my headphone and music on.  I could just smile and wave as I passed by them. I couldn't hear them, so Perhaps they were just giving me hearty greetings.   As much I wanted to help everyone (and a good deal of my extra money was spent in such a way) I need to learn to harden my heart, y'all!!!!!) 

For me, living in Bali for a week was also weird because it was SO HOT that I pretty much LOST my appetite. I mean, I recognized I was hungry, but after about four or five bites of any meal, I was uninterested in eating again.  I LITERALLY lost 8 pounds in Bali.   I wasted so much money on food that I didn't eat.  And the only cheap food was the greasy stuff that wasn't good cos it was so hot.  Things started tasting like sandpaper in my mouth within five minutes.  I ended up keeping my calories up partially through liquid sugar which kept me alive, I'm thinking.  I was pretty much always hungry, but could never eat much.  I don't remember it being like that in Texas (which can be pretty hot) but maybe it isn't as hot (or maybe the humidity.  

The other lesson from food was that I COULD enjoy light stuff like fruit, etc. but there was the danger of 'Bali Belly"   So the only stuff I could eat heartily  (and I discovered two days too late) was fruit which was likely washed with Bali water and made me spend half my day in the bathroom.  So, no fun walks around on the beach unless I waited at least an hour after every meal to see how my body was going to react to the food.  Sigh.   

I was also allery sick the whole time.  I think my room has mold, maybe? which is kind of reasonable for that area of the world.   So, I was sick from Bali Belly and stuck in the room that was making me cough and sneeze and have a stuffed up nose. and now that I'm back in Korea, the congestion is gone, but all those days dealing with allergies has given me an infection. I'm blowing my nose and irrigating, and I fear a shot in the bootie is in my near future. LOL   One thing about Korea, you can ALWAYS depend on a shot in the bootie when it comes to allergies!  I'm pretty sure I've had at least 4 since I've been here. LOL

Oh, another lesson about Bali for y'all, if you're thinking of going: Pretty much EVERY restaurant and EVERY service you receive at your hotel will come with a 10 % tax for paying out the workers and a 10% government tax, so anything you do will come with a large added cost.  So, keep that in mind.

The service prices are pretty great, though. I got an hour massage, a pedicure, and a manicure for $ 11.   I got a foot scrub, and hour massage, a green tea body scrub, and a 40 minute green tea body soak for (2 hours) $21.   If you brought enough money, you could have a massage every day.

Surfing lessons and snorkeling is cheap.  Most people charge about $13 for a hour lesson.  and Snorkeling (a 4-5 hour affair) is only $56!  Really great if you have the extra money (which next time I will.)  and/or you're not struggling with Bali Belly. 

I did afford to have an hour long surfing lesson which was fun, but OH SO tiring!  Also, I did a terrible job at surfing. I never once got up on the board.  IF i want to try it again, I'll have to work on my upper body strength and maybe do some yoga/stretching exercises on the regular.  Those surfing lesson really reminded me that I am 54 years old and things aren't necessarily going to be as easy as my mind thinks they'll be! LOL

I wrote everything up until here the day I came home from Bali and didn't publish it, so it became I draft which I didn't look at again until today, a full five months after I returned home.  I can't really remember many of the stories I thought I'd tell, so maybe I will stop here.  It was a semi-fun vacation, which I might try again, but it was objectively one of the worst vacations I've ever had.  None of the others were TERRIBLE, so this one was either, just the worst one I've had! LOL.  Anyway.  I'm looking forward to the next one which probably won't be for more than a year.    Talk to y'all later.

The Phantom Limb

 

For Loralee

J. Andrew Hobdy

She dances upon my eyelids
as I close them for slumber.
I can feel her beside me
like a phantom itch.
Phantom Limb written by J. Andrew Hobdy in autumn of 1996

Her voice lingering on my ear
as the echo of a tympani in an empty room
As a yell on the barren plain.
Her love is the spring
renewing all life,
bringing rain to my dry and thirsty soul.
peace
She is the lighthouse amid the tempest
filling the black void with a brilliant light
her love is as constant as the tide
often low and ebbing
lying in wait
but sometimes raging.
I long for that rage.