From the Cobwebs: Reconnecting Twenty: Brian Brady

I wrote this immediately after our 20 year Reunion...so, sometime in the Autumn of 2007.

Current mood: happy

My memories of Brian Brady are few. I remember his curly hair. I remember that we rode Mrs. Bailey's bus together to Dobie Middle School and that we had lockers very near each other in sixth grade. I, also, remember that he was a pretty nice guy, even though he once admonished me for my use of the word "Shazbot" (Mork and Mindy anyone?) in exchange for the "S" word.

"You know," he said to me straight-faced and seriously that long ago day, "You might as well just go ahead and use the real word." I don't recall my response, but I know I walked away from that interaction chastised and obedient. I never used the word "Shazbot" again.

Those three years flew past us, as did the following four, and the following four and the following sixteen; and here we are, meeting again for our twenty-year reunion. Most faces looked familiar to me, but I must confess that when I saw Brian last night at Rodney's "Old School" after-the-game shindig, I didn't recognize him at first. The passage of twenty years had changed him. Gone was his curly hair. He was taller. He was wearing glasses and the laugh lines that decorated his ever-youthful face seemed to declare that the years that had passed were happy ones. But though there were changes, when I really looked into his face, I recognized the Brian I knew in middle school.

He seemed to recognize me at once. "Hi Lori" he said as he hugged me with the one arm that wasn't holding a drink. What ensued was the normal "So, whatcha been doing the past twenty years?" conversation. While it was nice to hear about his adventures, that conversation was not the one that has stuck with me. It was the next one.

We were standing in Rodney's garage and Brian turned to me. "You know, I have to tell you two things I've noticed about you" he said, matter-of-factly. "Are they bad things?" I asked him apprehensively. "Well" he answered seriously, "one of them is." My heart thumped a bit more quickly, and, accepting the inevitable, I asked Brian to give me the bad news first.

Whilst pointing to my TOTALLY ROCKIN' COOL Huey Lewis and the News t-shirt and shaking his head grimly, Brian informed me that my beloved shirt had to go into the rubbish bin, but quick!! A smile graced my face as I realized his joke, and I awaited eagerly the good news. Brian, once again somber and serious, said to me "The fact that you came here to our reunion without wearing any make-up is the ultimate in cool. You are just being yourself." He laughed as he said, "It says a lot about you that you are willing to wear the t-shirt of that LAME band, even here at an activity where most people want to impress and things can sometimes get a bit pretentious." He stopped and looked at me slyly out of the corner of his eyes. "I mean, look at me! I rented a car to drive to the reunion!"

Our conversation continued. We talked about this and that and while I don't remember what was said, I do remember how I felt. I felt special. I felt beautiful. I felt vindicated, especially in light of some of my recent wranglings with self doubt. My regular readers will remember the extra long blog that accompanied the approach of my recent birthday. I have reconciled, inside myself, those feelings, but it is nice to have some reinforcement from an outside source. I can be attractive and worthwhile just by being me. It's good to know that about yourself, yeah? I hope I always remember that fact. But what I really hope is that, from today forward, Brian will know and remember —that to this 38-year-old, who still has a teenaged and a bit unsure Lori Ford hidden somewhere deep inside of her—he will always be a little bit of a hero.


Currently listening :
The Living Years
By Mike + the Mechanics
Release date: 25 October, 1990